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My diagnosis

Tips from my new self-help book, How To Win Every Conversation
Happy Birthday, America

Pie chart internet

As an armchair psychologist, I can say with absolute confidence that the subject of this news story is a classic narcissist, with a hint of borderline personality disorder and a sprinkle of ADHD.

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Speaking as a person who neither knows you nor is a specialist in the subject you inquired about, I’m 100% certain that your problem could be fixed if you changed your oil 1,000 miles earlier.

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As a certified stranger on the internet, I’m sorry to inform you that definitely have cancer. It’s pretty bad, all the cancer you have in you. As everyone knows, there’s no possible treatment for cancer. Just my two cents.

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Oh, you should definitely break up with him. What was the question?

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I’m not a lawyer, but the Constitution of the United States can be ignored without penalty if you are 1) A farmer, 2) Really bad at spelling, or 3) Personally inconvenienced by taxes.

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As someone who is neither a rabbi nor an active attendant of a Temple, I’m absolutely certain that people with non-Jewish mothers can’t be Jews. Sorry if you’re offended that I’m right, goy.

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He’s definitely the murderer. You can tell because he looks so sketchy in his mugshot.

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Everyone who has a sexual fantasy that I personally do not share is wrong, and should feel bad about it. Next question.

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********** M4KE $$$$$ WORKING FROM HOME WITH UR B!G D1CK *******

Tips from my new self-help book, How To Win Every Conversation
Happy Birthday, America

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