Every apartment is terrible

Drag baseball
Life happens

I’ve been apartment hunting at peak season in Seattle, and I just picked out my new place. I got all spun up last night reading the reviews of the building, which are only so-so. Then I realized that all apartment reviews are terrible. Seriously, check out these stinkers from some of the most exclusive residences in town.

The Escala


A man was shot to death about a block away, today, 4/7/14, so keep that in mind when you read the positive reviews here about how great a neighborhood this building is in.  He’s still at large so hopefully you don’t run in to the killer at night.

The Olivian


However, let’s be real here: the building’s aging (five years and counting) and it is starting to show.

Some very large parties were hosted by a few residents and attended by all non residents.  These parties were jammed with people that clearly just heard about this party in this cool building and showed up.  You were supposed to have security hired if your party had over a dozen people in the commons area.  This never happened and parties got out of control with excessive drinking.  Of course inappropriate language was big at these parties.

The parking garage is disgusting, my lovely white sportscar ended up with black soot all over the hood every time I parked there overnight.

The Shelby


The halls smell of trash a few days a week and are consistently dirty, the weight room equipment is outdated as well and the TV remote does not work for volume or power. The elevators are notoriously slow and the parking spaces are minuscule.

Initially, we thought it was great as it is so close to all the hip restaurants but we clearly figured out how unsafe it gets during the night. It is surrounded by junkies and bums, drug dealing takes place openly at every corner. We drive even to first avenue simply because it is unsafe to walk there.

The Stratford


Unfortunately, the genius who laid the building out split once larger apts into an average size one bedroom and tiny studios, who share walls with the larger units’ bedrooms. Therefore, if tenants are not monitored, you’re going to get woken up all night by transients and welfare collectors, the only people who would rent these horrible studios.

The Cobb


— No concierge
–The public rooftop indoor space smells like mothballs
— The window ledges are dirty. There used to be flag holders that have been painted over a million times. Is this attention to historic detail and preservation?!
— The 2BR/2 Bath layout doesn’t have a balcony.

The Harbor Steps

Harbor Steps

Built in the 1994, the decor is out-of-date.

The NW and NE towers only have two elevators compared to the south towers which each have four.

It’s a fantastic location if you enjoy being asked questions such as:

“Where is the mall?” and “Is this all there is to do around here?”

If you enjoy showing countless hordes of people how to buy and properly display their parking sticker – again, this is the place for you.

Do I hate tourists from the mid-west? You betcha.

I live in the NE tower and have to call the concierge if I want a package and it isn’t a Monday or Friday night… sorry but I can’t schedule my life around package hours.  There have been 3 instances that I have waited over 20 minutes for a package. YES, 20 minutes. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

Drag baseball
Life happens